‘Maturing’ With God
You know, as a kid, you watch your older sibling or even your cousin living their grown-up, early 20s life, and you’re on the other side thinking, “Wow, I can’t wait to get there.”
Then one day, you get there.
And now your 20s self looks back at your younger self and wonders, “Wow, I wish I could turn back the hands of time.”
Growing up is strange like that.
What does growing in faith actually look like?
I think part of it is accountability. But I also think it’s how your understanding of partnership changes.
Making a friend as a child requires so much less than making a friend as an adult.
As a kid, you know the basics. Respect. Manners. Having a good time.
But as you get older, friendship becomes deeper.
Who is around you?
Who is helping lift you up?
Who is speaking life into you?
Who is helping you become the person God is calling you to be?
Even relationships evolve.
You learn about love languages.
You learn about conflict.
You learn about forgiveness.
You learn that not everyone can come with you into every season.
And somehow all of this brings me back to one question:
What does my growing relationship with God look like?
Lately, I’ve been asking myself:
Am I waiting like David?
Or am I waiting like the Israelites?
If I’m being honest, I feel more like the Israelites.
Frustrated.
Tired.
Wondering how much longer.
Wanting answers.
Wanting movement.
Wanting relief.
But maybe maturity with God isn’t pretending those feelings don’t exist.
Maybe maturity is bringing them to Him anyway.
David did.
“I pour out before Him my complaint; before Him I tell my trouble.”
(Psalm 142:2)
David wasn’t afraid to tell God exactly how he felt.
In Psalm 13 he asks:
“How long, Lord? Will You forget me forever?”
Four times David asks, “How long?”
Not because he lacked faith.
Because he was hurting.
Then in Psalm 22:
“My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?”
These prayers sound raw.
Almost uncomfortable.
But they’re honest.
And honesty is still worship when it’s directed towards God.
Think about it.
You go to the doctor when you’re sick.
You go to the dentist when you have a toothache.
You call your close friend when you’ve had a bad day.
You can even submit a complaint to Uber Eats or Deliveroo because your order arrived wrong.
So why don’t we complain to God?
Why do we act like He can’t handle our questions?
“Lord, I’m over it.”
“I don’t get it.”
“Can we get to the happy part?”
“Can You release this burden from me?”
“What is the next step?”
“Why do I feel like I’m waiting?”
“Why did this specific pain happen to me?”
“Why do I feel lonely?”
“Why do I feel close to You one day and distant the next?”
Those questions don’t scare God.
When they’re given to Him, they become prayer.
Because the beautiful thing is that Scripture doesn’t just contain questions.
It contains replies.
Jesus tells us:
“Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered.”
(Luke 12:7)
Think about that.
The Father knows every strand.
Every tear.
Every fear.
Every disappointment.
He knows you.
And even when life feels uncertain, David reminds us:
“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.”
(Psalm 23:4)
Not around the valley.
Not over the valley.
Through it.
God’s presence doesn’t always remove the journey.
Sometimes it accompanies us through it.
One of my favourite scriptures, and the wallpaper on my phone, is Luke 8:48:
“Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace.”
I love that story.
This woman had been suffering from bleeding for twelve years.
Twelve years.
The crowd knew her by her condition.
The crowd knew her as the woman with the issue.
But Jesus called her daughter.
Twelve years of suffering didn’t change what He called her.
She pushed through the crowd.
She didn’t need a microphone.
She didn’t need a stage.
She didn’t need a long speech.
She simply reached out and touched the edge of His garment.
Just one touch.
And that makes me wonder.
If one touch can change everything, what does a relationship look like?
What does daily conversation look like?
What does intimacy with God look like?
Jesus says faith the size of a mustard seed is enough.
Not perfect faith.
Not giant faith.
Not faith that never asks questions.
Just enough faith to keep reaching.
Enough faith to keep walking.
Enough faith to keep trusting.
Enough faith to keep talking to Him, even when you don’t understand what He’s doing.
Maybe that’s what maturing with God looks like.
Not having all the answers.
But knowing where to take the questions.
Hmm.
Deep.
Well, that’s me.
Over and out.